Tamara Willems

What are you afraid of?

Today I’m thinking about this…
What is it you are so afraid of??
Debt…  I am afraid of debt, of the sinking, soaking hopelessness of debt.
For a long time as a one income family, and even now with two incomes and the magnitude of post-secondary educations for our children, debt is simply something that we
as best we can
Crowds… I am a little afraid of crowds, the too many people, not enough space, sometimes loud, overwhelming activeness of crowds.  Fortunately for me, my husband is well aware of this and so he holds my hand securely and comfortingly
as we go, and we
as best we can …
Public speaking… I am absolutely afraid of speaking in public. Common one I know, this for me can also be sometimes an audience as simple as two,
yet, without taking a vow of silence, I do
as best I can
Hate…  I am afraid of Hate, in its often irrational, and unfounded vitriolic and vile nature.
This is not a word I have in my vocabulary (even hesitate to write the word here), I don’t allow it in my home or In my family,  certainly I know it does exist in the world around me in many forms, but I make it my choice always to see the world
otherwise and yes
to manage
as best I can
and Rats …  yes, I am very afraid of rats (in any form!)  and I do my best to
as ‘never the twain shall meet’!
but here, let me tell you what I am not afraid of…
I am not afraid of life, especially one of my choosing filled with love and kindness, beauty and things that delight.
I am not afraid of Love, when it is freely given and lovingly received, and seems to me the most wonderful thing to celebrate, and to give.
I am not afraid of friendship, (the good kind) when it is comforting, bolstering, nurturing and kind, whether it has been five minutes or fifty years, when it is genuine… it counts.
I am not afraid of loss, as I know all too well … it does come to each of us, at some time. It seems to accompany Love, and possibly we wouldn’t know one, without also
knowing the other.
And when I write,
I am not afraid of exposing myself…  as human.
Hopefully what you find in my words is that yes, I believe myself to be loving and kind, swayed by beauty and eased by nature
yet too, that I can be bowled by the dastardly nature of hormones, irritable, unreasonable, overtly sensitive to
but what I am never afraid to be,
I write it down,
I offer it
this is me
and I
afraid that you might see,
(well, maybe just a little…)
but here,  here is my (not so secret) key
it’s Gratitude
afraid , unafraid, it is always Gratitude that saves me, fortifies me, anchors me
grounds me, emboldens me
and yes, allows me always
to manage
as best
I can ♥

So then, let me ask you this,
What is it You are so afraid of ??

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