Tamara Willems

when peace finds you…

(I started writing this on Wednesday, as a way to sort out the heaviness on my heart,
last night my Uncle John’s life came to its end, and he is now
free from pain, and resting in peace.)

 

I wonder my friend, if you should tire 
of hearing me speak 
about losing people we love 

all of us  
fated to this life 
and too, at some point 
to come  
to its  
end  

as my dear Uncle John is now 
in the final stages 
of his long lavishly textured life 
and I hold him here in my heart 
trying to channel ease for his peace-filled  
passing  

so much a part of my family, always
as much like a father to me, after the loss of my own 
a third set of grandparents to my kids 
we became and remained a vital lifeline 
to each other 
in difficult times 

we came too, to count ourselves most fortunate, he and I 
as I loved him much 
and he loved me too, and we made certain sure  
that each one knew it well 
so many conversations filled with both laughter, and 
tears 
since losing my Aunt Pat 
we loved and supported each other through loss 
and finding again life 
after

for a time after my Aunt died,
he took to living the life of riley
although in his late seventies and nearing eighty
acting much like a reckless teenager
but having the time of his life doing it
I never judged him,
in the quiet he’d say to me, what do you think your Aunt Pat would say
we would laugh, and I’d say him (with a grin)
Oh… I don’t think she’d be surprised

last visit he talked much about 
when I am gone, when I go 
when I am not here 
he now firmly in his eighties, and neither one of us under any illusions 
of life  
everlasting 
we spent time on gratitude 

this was the last text, he sent me, 
“Hey you!!! 
I hope you think of me and remember it is reciprocal. 
My life is very good or bad depending on the day. 
The good ones outweigh the bad. Thank God. 
As soon as these uncertain times steady up we will get together 
like the old days. 
In the mean time you can rest assured that you are in my thoughts 
Love you.” 

feels today, like the perfect thing 
to hold on to.  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Heartbreak today for a loss, but again I ground myself
in love
he sure did bless my life

and please, if I might ask,
offer the world love and kindness

at no time will you find
anyone,
any
one

who doesn’t need it ♥


to my honourary sister Nancy, for everything
as here we find ourselves again
i love you xx

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