One of the fun things about me now owning a cell phone, is that I have the ringtone set to a small symphony
\nand when on occasion it plays, (obviously not a call coming from someone I know, as clearly they would know – I don\u2019t use my \u2018phone\u2019 for that)
\nI always think,\u00a0 how lovely that bit of music, that has suddenly appeared as if from nowhere – instead of the abject fear that usually comes from a ringing phone.<\/p>\n
I am not a brave soul,
\nmost days
\nI would be content to never leave the sanctity
\nof my chair
\n(although\u2026 \u00a0wouldn\u2019t I have a very sore bottom!)
\nI like my home, my yard, my garden
\nand most certainly those who
\ninhabit it
\nI love the birds, the flowers and
\nthe
\npeace
\nto be found here
\nand really I don’t even mind the fluffy white blanket that
\ncurrently cloaks everything
\nin slumbering
\nsoftness<\/p>\n
I am feeling particularly vulnerable today
\nlike a need for a drawing in to
\nquiet
\nwhich doesn\u2019t mean silence exactly, just
\nsoothing sorts of things
\nof my choosing
\nI came home yesterday pent up in frustration
\npoured it all out to my husband
\nand tried hard to sloughed it off
\nlike a shedding of dead skin before it had the chance
\nto completely attach itself
\nto my tired flesh
\nand so this morning,\u00a0 as we sit to coffee
\ntogether
\nmy husband is extra lovely and kind
\nas I gather in..\u00a0 \u00a0simple joy
\neach of us sharing a quiet read
\ntogether
\nbefore necessary errands
\nand he, off to work<\/p>\n
when invitations come from friends
\nfor a night out,
\nI start to simmer a little in pressures
\nand what if\u2019s<\/p>\n
there are days, when I wonder
\nwould I be a better Mother
\na better wife
\na better friend, a better co-worker
\nor better person
\nif I were braver
\nwe all suffer from insecurities of some sort
\ndon\u2019t we
\nand really, if I were somehow \u2018better\u2019
\nwould I still
\nbe
\nme?<\/p>\n
After we have finished our errands for the day here,\u00a0 I fill myself with gratitude in truth,\u00a0 I am indeed
\nI put on a little music
\nmake myself a nice cup of tea
\nand return to the comforts of my chair
\nby the window
\nfor a few precious moments, I watch tiny snowflakes fall
\nand a grey squirrel enjoying his treats
\nI start to gently unravel the tangled threads that had begun
\nto tie themselves in knots
\ninside
\nme
\nI think of two of the loveliest little girls, who in the grocery store today
\nsang to me as I was rushing by for one more forgotten item.\u00a0 \u00a0\u201cI like your haaaaaa-irrrr \u266a\u266a\u201d<\/em>
\nto which I sang back
\n\u266aThaaaaank you-ooooo \u266a\u266a\u00a0<\/em>\u00a0 as I passed by
\nand we three,\u00a0 we
\nsmiled together,\u00a0 the BIGGEST OF SMILES<\/p>\n
\nfor these little dears
\nas now I am thinking..
\non days when I venture out
\nwhether physically,\u00a0 or even
\nin thoughts
\nand
\nwords<\/p>\n
\nthe bravest soul
\nthat
\nI
\ncan
\nbe \u2665<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"