the hardest part of losing someone is that you don’t so much lose something
\nit’s more to what you have acquired
\nthe emptiness
\nthe dull ache
\nthe missing piece
\nit’s not just a loss,
\nit is more to this dreadful
\ngain<\/p>\n
– the above is mine, \u00a0but probably better said by Donald Hall –<\/p>\n
\u00a0“You think that their I just finished reading The Best Day the Worst Day : Life with Jane Kenyon by Donald Hall<\/em>, a beautiful memoir of a marriage, of living, loving and losing. \u00a0I have a pretty good idea of how this will turn out, yet still I sat for at least an hour sobbing uncontrollably, as I read, \u00a0and Jane suffered, and then died.. I am like a sea sponge. my heart breaks open but perhaps to accept the sadness yet in my sponge like nature to allow for life to still raise my face and then a good cry<\/p>\n and always the hardest part of losing someone is that you don’t so much lose something it’s more to what you have acquired the emptiness the dull ache the missing piece it’s not just a loss, it is more to this dreadful…
\n<\/span>dying is the worst<\/span><\/em>
thing that could happen.<\/span><\/em>
Then they stay dead.”\u00a0<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n
\nThis combined with a cool, windy rainy fall day has made me feel a little dull today.
\nGrey skies, often have me feeling just that … \u00a0grey.
\nI am carrying the profound sadness of Donald Hall and the sad loss of Jane Kenyon with me, even though this actually happened 20 years ago!
\nOf course, I am still greatly missing my Aunt Pat, \u00a0still feeling ..
\nthat missing piece.<\/p>\n
\nI am permeable,
\nfull of holes,
\nable to absorb things easily
\ntoo easily…<\/p>\n
\nregularly<\/p>\n
\nthis also allows
\nfor things to flow
\nfreely
\nand not take root<\/p>\n
\nto feel the loss
\nto wallow a bit
\nin a kind of grey -ness<\/p>\n
\nto be open
\nto keep only the bits
\nthat nourish
\nand let the others go<\/p>\n
\nto ebb and flow
\nto draw in Love
\nand
\nto let it go ..<\/p>\n
\nto the sky
\nand see the clouds sailing over
\nin constant motion
\nthis too shall pass …<\/p>\n
\nto pour myself a cup of tea,
\nto find comfort
\nin a rainy day
\nin a good book
\nand<\/p>\n
\nto find myself
\nresting
\nin Gratitude \u00a0\u2665<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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