{"id":440,"date":"2016-02-06T15:20:36","date_gmt":"2016-02-06T20:20:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/?p=440"},"modified":"2016-02-07T10:57:46","modified_gmt":"2016-02-07T15:57:46","slug":"440","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/?p=440","title":{"rendered":"to the head and to the heart"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201cI am certain of nothing but the holiness of the Heart’s affections and the truth of the Imagination.\u201d
\n<\/span><\/span>~ John Keats<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

My husband unexpectedly proposes a date night.
\nHe’s just picked me up from work and I am covered in dirt and wet. \u00a0I am certain i probably don’t smell too good and I am very, very tired. \u00a0So before this information reaches my heart, \u00a0it must first sort itself, \u00a0in my head.
\nInitial reaction, is to cringe, turn up my nose and to whinge.
\nWhy should the offer of a hockey game followed by a lovely late night dinner out with someone I love invoke feelings of dread, you may ask? \u00a0Well, this is the nature of me ..
\nWe seem to live in a culture of constant motion, lights sound, BIG, LOUD, BOISTEROUS, LOOK AT ME, LOOK AT ME, DON’T LOOK AWAY, NOTICE ME, BE ENTERTAINED!!!!!
\n<\/strong>I do enjoy hockey, but the last time we went I found the constant flash of lights circling the arena, flashing colours and images and big booming sound every time there is a pause in play such an assault on my senses. \u00a0I was completely overwhelmed.
\nThen there is dinner, \u00a0and it is out .. \u00a0in public, \u00a0and there are decisions and awkwardness, and what if, and what if … \u00a0and what if…
\nNow, before you view me as a pathetic mess, this all flashes through my brain in a matter of seconds.
\nOf course, \u00a0the offer of a night out with my Love also reaches my heart, and yes, I would follow him anywhere.
\nAnd I do.
\nThe evening is wonderful. \u00a0The hockey game is great, dinner is fantastic, my husband all to myself (well, and of course the rest of the general public) and blissfully we return home. \u00a0My heart is full.
\nAnd this is me,
\nI live in my heart,
\nI lead with my heart
\nI am
\nmy heart
\nit is always open, and feeling,
\nwhich I guess sometimes makes me feel
\ndelicate
\nThat the porousness of my heart
\nleaves me open to
\nwounding
\nThat my preference for the quiet beauty of nature
\nleaves me
\nsensitive
\nto overload
\nThat my love for the comforts of home
\nleaves me sometimes
\nfearful of the bustling ‘noise’ of the world
\nof being swallowed whole
\ntrampled
\nYet it is in the strength of my heart
\nthat I am guided
\nthat I trust
\nthat I blossom
\nit is in the giving of my heart
\nthat I
\nam me.
\nsometimes I am mush, things touch me and I am moved to somehow share the beauty and wonder that fills me to overflowing. \u00a0My tears are always close, my emotions strong. \u00a0Perhaps I am not a good ‘gatherer of friends’, \u00a0not always social, not always willing.
\nBut I can also be brave,
\nand fun
\nand free
\nand, yes …
\nhere.
\nTo those who’s lives I have crossed paths with, and to you who have honoured me with friendship , \u00a0I hope that I am somehow able to convey my gratitude always to you for touching my heart.
\nThe large feeling-ness of my heart is always open,
\nand I will continue to welcome the world in,
\nin my own small
\nand ‘just a little quiet please’
\nway ..
\nwith Love \u00a0\u2665<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cI am certain of nothing but the holiness of the Heart’s affections and the truth of the Imagination.\u201d ~ John Keats My husband unexpectedly proposes a date night. He’s just picked me up from work and I am covered in…
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