{"id":4560,"date":"2023-03-04T16:05:32","date_gmt":"2023-03-04T21:05:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/?p=4560"},"modified":"2023-03-04T16:05:36","modified_gmt":"2023-03-04T21:05:36","slug":"flashes-of-letting-go","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/?p=4560","title":{"rendered":"flashes of letting go…"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

A winter storm that strangely comes
with thunder and frequent
wild flashes of lightning<\/p>\n\n\n\n

under the great weight
of heavy wet snow
a large branch falls from a tree
in the garden
and crashes to the ground\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

the loss of someone
who has been fighting their own demons
for so very long<\/p>\n\n\n\n

sits
somewhere, uncomfortably
in the pit
of your
stomach
has one feeling\u2026 what
exactly<\/p>\n\n\n\n

days when one wishes
they knew nothing at all about addictions
the very vicious circles or rather
fate-filled crazy eights
the all too familiar nasty game of
snakes
and
ladders<\/p>\n\n\n\n

that pulls one in
and under<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and how hard it sometimes is
to find the strength
to climb
the very cruelness of
how much easier it becomes
just
to
slide<\/p>\n\n\n\n

the widening ripple effects
of lives touched<\/p>\n\n\n\n

so much loss for a dear family<\/p>\n\n\n\n

proud, proud father
of his own<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and a wide circle of friends
with almost nothing to try to makes sense of
just
great sadness<\/p>\n\n\n\n

but oh
for the fond memories
from brighter days<\/p>\n\n\n\n

these are things
we\u2019ll remember most<\/p>\n\n\n\n

these
are the things
to remember<\/p>\n\n\n\n

most ((\"\u2764\ufe0f\u200d\ud83e\ude79\"))<\/p>\n\n\n\n

With love and care and peace
to find you \"\ud83d\ude4f\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

**if I could just add a small addendum to this post:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

thoughts on a morning as the sun
rises,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You know, I can still clearly remember the first time
he told me
he thought he had a real problem with cocaine
gosh, thinking now,
we were so young and so,
so
unsure<\/p>\n\n\n\n

we held on to each other and
we both cried<\/p>\n\n\n\n

it has been many, many years since then
since we were
wildish crazy kids together
most days it feels like
a fine few lifetimes ago<\/p>\n\n\n\n

never had any animosity between us
always remained friends<\/p>\n\n\n\n

and I was thinking,
if those big unseasonal flashes of lighting last night
followed by the morning\u2019s
bright beautiful sunshine
tell us anything about life\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I think to be remembered, and to
have mattered
is the thing<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I know he\u2019d like that
and to always value the friends you make
along the way
always<\/p>\n\n\n\n

the ones who help you
the ones who
hold you
and the ones who made you smile<\/p>\n\n\n\n

be kind to each other \"\ud83d\udc97\"\"\ud83d\ude4f\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

( to friends who have reached out to me again I thank you,
your kindness is always appreciated \"\ud83d\udc9e\")<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n



<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A winter storm that strangely comeswith thunder and frequentwild flashes of lightning under the great weightof heavy wet snowa large branch falls from a treein the gardenand crashes to the ground\u2026 the loss of someonewho has been fighting their own…
Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":4561,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[960,886,958,375,952,959,74],"class_list":["post-4560","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-addiction","tag-loss-2","tag-lossofafriend","tag-loveandloss","tag-memories","tag-substanceabuse","tag-toyouthisday"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4560","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4560"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4560\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4564,"href":"https:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4560\/revisions\/4564"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/4561"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4560"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4560"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tamara.tedzplace.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4560"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}