I spend the morning resisting the urge
to ask him
if he still loves me
when I know he does, but just sometimes
it’s still nice to hear it
always I marvel at how someone chooses
the everyday
the day in and day out of things
what makes You
love
Me
I have asked him to submit his answers in essay form
a request
he has not yet acquiesced
while I, he knows well
could easily write him.. a book
do you think if we knew these things, or
heard them often enough
we would always try to make sure they were
on obvious
display
or would that then become too
superficial
I mean, nothing is lovelier than to hear someone
wax poetic about how it was
they fell in love
what was that thing, that moment, those qualities
and I think it does as much for ourselves
as for the other
to be reminded of… the lovelier things
now and
then
A few weeks ago, you may remember
our big maple in front of the house broke off
in a storm
thoroughly crushing a large burning bush below
and both had to come down
leaving the outside almost completely thrashed and
much changed
suddenly, over exposed
and barren
a feeling I’ve yet to
adjust
to
stepping out to check the mail
feels like a stage
I don’t want to be on
amazing you know, how much cozy comfort one gains
from a large shady tree
and just how much.. home it contains
still feels weirdly like a death in the family
like no matter what else we do there
something
will always be missing
we have started replanting, in the process of
rewilding
with much more purpose in mind,
than a
front lawn, maintaining
grass
but everything starts small
and still looks kind of haphazard
everywhere signs that… something
happened here
I do worry how the squirrels and the
birds will adjust
yet I suppose, like the rest of us
they do
haven’t got much choice, otherwise
after he has gone off to work
I take a little snack outside
to my chair by the pond
sit with the sun on one shoulder
talk to the fish, watch the birds
the butterflies and the clouds
let the breeze brush my face, and the sun
warmly romance
my
skin
let the colours and textures around
gather me in, in a parade of
riches
breathe in deep, listen and
smile
try then to put down a few words
about love
where I find
it is best
to always fill oneself very full to overflowing
with this stuff
as the heart, when it is open
has a great capacity
to hold
and also, a wonderful way
of
spilling out
and I guarantee you, there is always
someone
most willing
to
listen ♥